Gray Friday

The manager slowly realized that opening the doors
at 3 pm Thanksgiving day had been a terrible mistake.

I've never gone shopping on Black Friday--and I don't think I ever will--but not because I'm afraid of the crowds or because I don't like shopping (although both of those are true, in general).  I like to think that people are really just perpetuating a grand myth about the day, and that in reality there are just a few people milling around the stores, chatting and lazily running their fingers over cashmere scarves and diamond necklaces on their velvet display cases.  I don't know where everyone else is, but I assume they are at the beach or something, sneakily updating their Facebook statuses so that everyone else who is secretly not shopping either will think that they are out snagging awesome deals amid the kerfuffle of crazed consumers.  I'd like to be on the beach at midnight tonight, all bundled up and huddled in a tent until morning arrives and the fun begins.

Image via calisphere.

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